Children who are raised in a very affluent society!


The above picture is a restful photograph which is digitally enhanced, Diane R. Isaacs, Ph.D…Cambrian Surf

Many of us have adult children.  I have been seeing patients, with many similar issues.  I would like to address the Children of the Affluent.

Many adults over 50, have adult children.  The adults that I would like to discuss have raised their children with giving up some of their own lives, money and time, to give these children the very best in education, graduate school, cars, vacations and trips abroad and toys to know what it is to live the good life.

many of these adult children, have actually grown up in the culture of the affluent.  These adult children of the upper or upper-middle class can and do manifest elevated disturbance in several areas, such as substance abuse, anxiety and depression.  Many in my practice, and through speaking with other professionals, see a high risk of adult children, who are spoiled, some with anxiety, and depression, and thinking that is opposite of what their adult parents seemed to want to instill in values and behavior in their adult children.

There seems to be indication of excessive giving of pleasure to these adult children, who are a different generation, and appear spoiled, and sometimes wind up isolated from the parents.  The other issues again change when these adult children begin life anew with daughter-in-laws, son-in-laws, and an entire new extended family. Thus, sometimes nontrivial  threats adds to the family psychological system.  Some of these children have also grown up with high expectations from their families for grades, accomplishments, good schools, and excessive pressures to be all, and do all.

Family wealth and giving does not always translate to good wisdom or fabulous parenting, or creating the right spirit, for the future.

What I am trying to say is that there is studies that say that in plain speech, that this generation of adult children, from the baby boomer generation, have sometimes raised spoiled, and egocentric children, when really attempting to give their kids everything, that perhaps the baby boomer parents did or did not have.

As professionals, we must correct the long-standing neglect of a group of people who need professional attention.  Family wealth, or families who have given their wisdom in parenting or equanimity of spirit, does not always translate to healthy adult children and one generation further, grandchildren.

I have spoken with many adult parents over 50 who have adult children, with traits clear across the board, from being appreciative of what the parents have done, in the growing years, to the spectrum of marrying the right and wrong people, and sometimes emotionally cutting off the original family system.  These are hurtful and painful issues, which most parents are embarrassed to discuss, and worse, have little aptitude and knowledge of how to handle.  DI…

January 20l4

Growing up in the culture of affluence can connote various psychological and psycho-social risks….Studies have shown that upper-class children can manifest elevated disturbance in many areas, such as substance abuse, anxiety, and depression.  There are factors that seem to implicate that excessive pressure to achieve and isolation from parents, both literal and emotional are some parental goals when raising their children from early childhood education through university and beyond.  There are many other factors as well.  Communities that now have a large population of , families, from different cultures. have some very different views on how life should be when raising children.  Some families of various nationalities view education as a primary goal in rearing of children. The best schools, the highest grades, the best PSAT’s and the best SAT’s, and the best acceptance into the BEST schools in the nation are primary in some families outlooks for raising their children.  Sometimes from the outset of early childhood education, is the planning of the BEST schools, with high tuition, and  the the goal is to achieve acceptance into these universities, thereby giving these affluent children a greater chance to achieve in the world.  There is some tremendous disagreement about this.

Some of the issues for pushing high achievement pressure onto young children and high school, saw achievement failures as personal failures, and have relatively high  levels of depression and anxiety and substance abuse.

Another issue is:  Does rebellion among affluent teens really exist and count? All adolescents might be drawn to overt forms of rebellion, but it is quite possible that wealthy youth, unlike their counterparts, can dabble in drug use or delinquency without any substantive damage to their life prospects, given various safety nets in the family system.

What concerns many of us as psychologists, and marriage and family therapists, is the ever growing group of adults from these affluent families that have turned into very indulged adults.  It is very easy to say that many of the results of these adult children are narcissism, as adults to those parents and adults who they were surrounded by.  What I am saying, is that we are seeing a group that is very spoiled, indulged, and self involved young adults beginning the cycle over again, and the generation of parents of these kids, wondering why their family systems do not get along, and have trouble communicating.

Perhaps there needs to be a re-evaluation of what affluent parents have reaped after giving their offspring everything.  DI