Social Media

It has become quite apparent in my practice as a psychologist, along with observation in resturants and human behavior, that we have a serious problem in our society.  Social Media is a wonderful way to communicate at all levels. In saying that, we have an entire new set of issues to handle as therapists and psychologists.  Example:  Sitting in a resturant last weekend, a couple I observed, kept texting.  I kept observing their communication. Instead of speaking to each other, they continued to text. I have also seen this in my office, where people attempt to text or write to their significant others, while in session. I have set special rules, that this is not acceptable in my office. I have known individuals who only communicate by writing to each other via a text message, thereby negating face to face speaking and communication.  I also know individuals who use the social media to post messages, which should be discused differently. Meaning, the discussions should be face to face, or by telephone. As a psychologist, this type of communication is a disaster, waiting to happen, as the social media provides a manner to triangle people in writing,  Serious issues between married partners, and between parents and children, are sometimes written on Facebook for the entire world to see.   Issues between parents and children, should not be using the media to speak between parent and adult children or in otherwards should not have third party intervention, unless by a professional if needed.  I have been in practice many years.

One has heard of the old cliche of “Airing ones dirty linen in public.”  Problems between relatives, siblings, and parents and children and even friends, becomes questionable when using Social Media.  What happened to people speaking directly to people, and looking one another in the face.  Using this media to convey conversations, which may be too uncomfortable to say in person, is a poor communication technique.  When posting private and otherwise confidential information, for the purpose of sharing this information publically, is  a lack of respect for the art of basic communication between families and friends.  Psychologically, sometimes this is done intentlly to hurt, or share otherwise private information with anyone.  Also, this can be noted as triangling.  This would be triangling other people into a personal conversation.

Even Email needs to be re-thought.  If you feel safe for others to have others read what you have written before you send, then email what you please.  Otherwise, people need to re-read who, where, and what they are sending, before they push the SEND button.  Too many public and political emails have been targets for embarrassing situations, which should have been thought out before sending.  This also goes on with private email.  Be careful before you push the send button.  Re-Read Always!

We need to be face to face, when communicating more often, and not for the entire world to know about. We must ask ourseleves in our own family system, what is right and what is wrong. For instance, maybe families should create rules, for their dinner table, and when to text, and about use of cell phones. I have personally been at a dinner table, where under age children are allowed to text at the table. This is becomming a serious issue in socicety. The negatives are plenty. One does not have  look another in the eye, by texting, or even emailing. Isn’t this passive agressive and just plain rude?  The good for society is that social media allows individuals to learn about their society and what is happening in a new world of communication. The bad is when it is used negatively. More later…..D